Top Ten Pitfalls of Being a Psychotherapist

Caution: Taking this seriously may be dangerous to your mental health!

1. You forget how to conduct small talk and can empty a room at a party in 30 seconds flat!

2. You’re constantly biting your tongue around friends and family (arm-chair therapizing of family is particularly de trop!)

3. ….and on the other end of the spectrum, running screaming from the room, after a 9 hour day in your therapy office, when your family wants to tell you about their marital challenges/office politics/boyfriend troubles/aches and pains/parenting dilemmas, etc.

4. Your hairdresser tells you all her problems. (Isn’t it usually the other way around?)

5. When you tell people you’re a therapist, they either (a) look scared and clam up or, (b) look grateful and unburden themselves or, (c) they ask if you can read minds and then test you, Verizon style, on your skill. (“Okay, can you read me now?”)

6. Your head is permanently tilted quizzically to one side.

7. You use the word “feel” so much it makes you want to slap yourself.

8. Having to hang out around other therapists.

9. Coming to the ghastly realization that your bottom is creeping out to the edges of your therapy office chair.

10. Comprehending with horrified astonishment that clients think you’re what passes for sane!